Talking to kids about scary news

Photo: Post-Journal

The news this week around Chautauqua County has left us all reeling: The murder of the Clymer Central Schools superintendent... A sexual assault in Brooklyn Square... Reports of gunfire around the city... And the burglary and subsequent stabbing on Barker Street. We can try and shelter our kids from this news, but the truth of the matter is that they're already talking about it on the playground and in the cafeteria.

Sasha Emmons, a writer for Parenting.com, has an article well-worth a look:  5 Tips on Talking to Kids About Scary News.
 

Joy at work

One of the great things about the Youth & Theology program at Princeton Theological Seminary is the exposure to the top thinkers in the field at our monthly online check-ins. recently our learning cohort was joined by Jeff Dunn-Rankin, the Vice President of Consulting at Youth Ministry Architects. We talked about cultivating volunteers and building support, then the conversation turned to careers.

Youth ministry has a pretty high burnout rate. The compensation is about 25% less than the average salary for a pretty demanding job that isn’t always acknowledged by the congregation, so it’s no surprise. Jeff has seen it all, consulting with churches of many different denominations throughout the country, so our group wanted to get his perspective on longevity in ministry. He had some great things to share, applicable to our group and the wider working world too, hence this column.

He said the key characteristic he sees in people with vocational longevity is great joy. They’re joyful at their tasks in the good times and the hard times. “People that love their jobs made a decision to love their jobs,” he said. The inverse holds true with unhappy people. They’re unhappy wherever they are, at whatever they’re doing.

Everyone has positive and negative things happen in the workplace. But the unhappy and the happy approach the negative things in radically different ways. An unhappy person sees themselves as a victim of life circumstances. A happy person recognizes that they are in a bad spot (no rose-colored glasses) but is mature enough to take responsibility for making it better.

He also offered several other observances worth noting:

1. Happy people make decisions. Jeff gave us an example based on the money conversation we had earlier in the conference. You can decide to live on the money and be satisfied, or decide that you need a different job/line of work because you can’t live on the salary. The world will continue to turn whichever you decide, so go ahead and decide. Unhappy people tend to get stuck—they stay in a situation where they’re unsatisfied because they won’t make a choice.
2. Happy people tend to their own souls. They recognize that their job title is only one part of their identity. They maintain healthy boundaries between work and family time. They find ways to be refreshed and recharged so they can go back and serve other people with their best.   
3. Happy people invest lots of time in the biggest problems they’re facing. They prioritize to have the biggest impact.
4. Happy people embrace the workplace’s culture where it is. 
5. Happy people make changes slowly rather than quickly. They figure out whether something that bothers them is a “must fix” or “live with it” situation. They build support for changes rather than just go off like the Lone Ranger.

Some great advice—whether there is a steeple on your workplace or not!

Ian Eastman, M.A. promotes the spiritual, social, and emotional development of young people and their families. He is the Conference Youth Coordinator for the Southwestern New York Conference of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, the Coordinator of the Shared Lutheran Youth Ministry in Jamestown NY, and a Youth Minister in the Pastoral Care Department at Gustavus Adolphus Family Services. He is a graduate of SUNY Empire State College (B.S. Cultural Studies), Northwest Nazarene University (M.A. Spiritual Formation), and is currently a student at the Institute for Youth Ministry at Princeton Theological Seminary.

Pool It!

Southwestern Conference Youth Ministries presents POOL IT! Sunday, October 14 from 3 pm - 6 pm at the Jamestown Community College Total Fitness Center, 525 Falconer St. in Jamestown NY.

Come enjoy the pool, hot tub, or whirlpool. Snack on pizza. Worship together with other youth from around the conference and hear how people your age are making a difference!

Admission is just $5. Proceeds benefit ELCA World Hunger.

For more information about this event please contact Ian Eastman, Southwestern Conference Youth Ministry Coordinator at (716) 720-8584 or ifeastman@yahoo.com.

Open publication - Free publishing - More lutheran

How to Have a Family Meeting

Weekly family meetings are an effective and pleasant way to bring the family together, to improve communication, to set weekly goals, to recognize and reward progress, and to determine each member's needs and feelings. Healthy Children has some great tips for holding a family meeting. Here's the link.

Shared Lutheran Youth Ministry now in its 4th year!

Come join the Shared Lutheran Youth Ministry (SLYM) as we kick off our 4th year of ministry! It is for young people in grades 5 - 12. We have fun together, worship together, and do projects that make a difference around the community.

This year we're learning how to live out our faith EVERY DAY, EVERYWHERE, IN EVERY RELATIONSHIP!


God has entered into our world with love and grace, claiming us even in the midst of our imperfections, inconsistencies, and self-centered egos. So how should we respond? Christ illustrates this through a story about a Samaritan no one wanted to use a term like “good” to describe. We’ll examine this story over several weeks and discover how God uses unlikely people (like us) to accomplish his work.

Thursdays 6 pm - 8 pm
G.A. Learning Center
200 Gustavus Ave.

Sept. 20: “Making a Friend”
Come celebrate our 4th year with open gym, hang out time, and worship.

Sept. 27: “W.H.E.A.T”
Learn how be caring and welcoming, plus enjoy all the regular things like gym, etc.

Check out our newsletter & parent page below:

Open publication - Free publishing - More jamestown

SLYM is a cooperative effort of Bethel Lutheran Church, First Lutheran Church, G.A. Family Services, Holy Trinity Lutheran Church & Immanuel Lutheran Church.

Emily wants to serve more

Today's guest blogger is Emily Whitney from Holy Trinity Lutheran Church. Emily went to the Youth Gathering in New Orleans with Chautauqua Area Lutheran Youth this July.

I loved the worship service during our Practice Peacemaking day. I don't know why. I think it was the atmosphere of an auditorium with an awesome praise band. I was surprised how many people were there! And there were so many attractive boys too! The fact we could commune 33,000 people in a relatively short time was cool. After being at the Youth Gathering I feel like I want to serve people more and do more of God's work with my hands. I want to thank everyone who helped us fundraise to go on this fantastic trip. National Youth Gathering Detroit 2015 LEGGO!

Chautauqua Area Lutheran Youth gratefully acknowledges the support of the Karl Peterson Funds & Lynn Foundation Fund of the Chautauqua Region Community Foundation in making this project a reality.

100 Questions to Ask Your Kids

"Kids often shy away from conversation because (a) it means trouble, not fun; (b) it's not about something they really care about; or (c) the questions are too broad, too hard for them to organize into any easy, focused answer. Result? Monosyllabic answers and very short conversations."

FamilyEducation has a good strategy to get young people talking: make it a two-way conversation. They also have 100 good questions to get you started. Check it out in the link:

FamilyEducation: 100 Questions to Ask Your Kids

Meeting minutes for September 2012 Conference Youth Ministries Team

Southwestern Conference Youth Ministries Team Meeting

Saturday, September 8 @ 9 am

First Lutheran Church

Present: Ian Eastman (SW Conference), Tara Eastman (First), Judy Lind (Immanuel), Ann McKillip (St. Timothy) & Jennifer Spacht (Bethel Jamestown).

Regrets: Mike Felsman (Tri Church), Sue Kilmartin (Bethel Jamestown) & Craig Rodgers (Zion Frewsburg).

Prayer & Devotions...

We read the story of how God helped the Israelites cross the Jordan River on dry ground  (Joshua 4).  Joshua told the people to take stones from the river and display them for their descendants. In essence, the stones encouraged the telling and retelling of the stories of God. We reflected on some markers in our own lives and shared those as a group.

Confirmed YOUTH calendar...

The calendar for 2012/2013 is as follows. Please get these posted on your church calendars and begin promoting these with young people and their parents. Events are open to youth in grades 5 - 12, with the exception of our summer mission trip, which is limited to grades 9 - 12. We want to make it easy for youth from every church in the SW Conference to participate in events that foster faith, give them a chance to serve, and have fun!

10/14/12   3pm - 6pm

POOL IT!

JCC Total Fitness Fitness Center

525 Falconer St., Jamestown NY 14701

Cost: $5

POOL IT is the first action-packed Southwestern Conference Youth Ministries event of this school year. Enjoy two hours of open swim, chillax in the whirlpool, or relax in the sauna! Enjoy some pizza and make some new friends from around the conference. We'll wrap up the day with a contemporary worship service with contributions from talented young people. Proceeds benefit the ELCA 100 Wells Challenge.

10/16/12   6:30pm - 7:30pm

MISSION TRIP INFO MEETING

Location TBA (watch your October church newsletter)

Come learn about our summer 2013 mission trip opportunity.

11/18/12   1pm - 4pm

THE WHOOPENSOCKER

Gateway Center

31 Water St., Jamestown NY 14701

Cost: $5 & donation of an item for the Captive Free team

Note: Snack bar will be open (additional cost)

This event is so cool that we had to use an imaginary word to describe it! THE WHOOPENSOCKER is pretty much the greatest recreation day ever. We'll have unlimited laser tag, access to the bmx/skatepark, human foosball court, a rec. room, and video games. Captive Free, a group of young people from throughout the United States, will lead us in worship.

The young people in Captive Free are devoting an entire year to ministry throughout our region. We ask churches and youth groups to collect personal care items for the team. Items needed are as follows:

• Airborne
• Batteries (9 Volt, AA, AAA)
• Cash
• Dayquil
• Dental Floss
• Deodorant
• Duct Tape
• Flashdrive
• Gas Cards
• Haircuts
• Ink Pens
• Lysol Spray & Wipes
• Body Wash
• Mouthwash
• National & International Phone Cards
• Plastic Water Bottles
• Razors
• Restaurant & Grocery Gift Cards (for unprovided meals)
• Shampoo/Conditioner
• Soap
• Stamps: Regular and Post Card
• Target & Walmart Gift Cards
• Toothbrushes
• Triple Antibiotic Ointment
• Vitamin C

We will also be providing meals and securing lodging for the team and will seek the assistance of people throughout the conference.

02/17/13  1pm - 4pm

TOILET BOWL 2

Gateway Center

31 Water St., Jamestown NY 14701

Cost: $5 & roll of toilet paper (or box of tissues, etc.)

Note: Snack bar open (additional cost)

Everybody gets excited about the Super Bowl, but the real excitement doesn't happen until THE TOILET BOWL 2. The first two hours are open recreation time: we have laser tag, bmx/skate ramps, pool table, ping pong, video games, human foosball, and more. The last hour is a worship service with a contemporary band and games/mixers. We'll meet a very practical need for a charitable agency: TP! Consider holding a paper drive in your youth group and church during February.

07/07/13 - 07/12/13

THE MISSION ON THE MON

McKeesport, PA

Cost: TBD

MISSION ON THE MON is a week-long Christian neighborhood immersion experience filled with mission projects in the local community and exposure to innovative ministries in the area.

Confirmed PARENT & ADULT calendar...

We want to help every family in the conference get equipped to foster faith in their homes. We want every adult in our conference know how to engage young people.

09/15/12  1:45 pm, 3 pm

THE FIELD GUIDE TO YOUNG PEOPLE

Women of the ELCA Convo

Chautauqua Suites

215 West Lake Rd.,  Mayville, NY 14757

Adolescent development can inform the way we assist youth in their faith formation. We will explore how to cultivate a healthy environment for young people, and promote spiritual practices that will help sustain young people through hard times.

09/16/12  9:15 am

09/23/12  9:15 am

09/30/12  9:15 am

10/07/12  9:15 am

FULL CIRCLE TRIPLE A TRAINING

Bethel Lutheran Church

904 West 3rd St., Jamestown NY

This is a 4 session course that could be called "how to talk and pray with your kids." There are many practical and theologically sound resource available to help parents and families grow in faith. Come learn with us! (Our goal is to offer this course with every church in the SW Conference. Contact Ian about scheduling.)

10/18/12   6:30pm - 7:30pm

MISSION TRIP INFO MEETING

Location TBA

Come learn about our summer 2013 mission trip opportunity for youth in grades 9 - 12.

10/21/12  5:30 pm

11/04/12  5:30 pm

11/18/12  5:30 pm

12/02/12  5:30 pm

FULL CIRCLE TRIPLE A TRAINING

Session 1 at First Lutheran, Session 2 at Immanuel, Session 3 at Saint Timothy, Session 4 at Bethel Jamestown.

Confirmed YOUTH WORKER & OTHER MINISTRY FOLKS calendar...

We want every church to be equipped with the knowledge and support they need to deliver excellent ministry to young people! 

10/26/12 - 10/27/12

YOUTH LEADER'S TRAINING EVENT

Lake Chautauqua Lutheran Center

Cost $50 (includes food & lodging)

This event is designed for volunteer and paid youth leaders with any level of experience. More details and a printable registration form can be found at this link.

12/01/12  9am - Noon

STEWARDS OF CHILDREN CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE PREVENTION TRAINING

First Lutheran Church

120 Chandler St., Jamestown NY

Cost $10

We are partnering with the Child Advocacy Program to deliver this evidence-based and third-party evaluated program. This training is appropriate for Clergy, Youth Workers, Sunday School Teachers, Nursery Workers--anyone in your church who works or volunteers with children or young people. Outcomes of the training are as follows:

• Increased awareness of the prevalence, consequences and circumstances of child sexual abuse 
• New skills to prevent, recognize and react responsibly to child sexual abuse 
• Proactive, positive input to change organizational policies and procedures 
• Individual commitment to action via a personal prevention plan 

Confirmed CONFERENCE YOUTH TEAM MEETING calendar...

10/06/12  9 am - 11 am

11/03/12  9 am - 11 am

12/01/12  9 am - 12 pm (This month's program devoted to Child Abuse Training)

01/05/13  9 am - 11 am

02/02/13  9 am - 11 am

03/02/13  9 am - 11 am

04/06/13  9 am - 11 am

05/04/13  9 am - 11 am

06/01/13  9 am - 11 am

08/03/13  9 am - 11 am

First Lutheran Church

120 Chandler St., Jamestown NY

This is the team that makes these events and trainings you're reading about happen. Meetings are open to youth in grades 9 - 12 and caring adults. Come help us discern the future of youth ministry in the SW Conference!

Egads! Additional info that doesn't fit anywhere else...

We have CAPTIVE FREE for the whole weekend.

• Saturday afternoon: We are looking for a church to host an event for children. We have a lead about a church interested in doing a Harvest Party with several other churches.
• Saturday night: Ian will follow up with Gustavus Adolphus Learning Center about doing a program for the residents.
• Sunday morning: Bethel Jamestown has booked the group for Sunday worship. It will provide breakfast and lunch.
• Sunday afternoon: Whoopensocker.
• Monday: Team sabbath. Sue Kilmartin is looking into some donations to give them some things to do around the Jamestown area.
• Tuesday: Tara Eastman is exploring doing a breakfast with the team at First Lutheran and inviting youth from all churches who attend Jamestown High School. First would also provide sack lunches for the team.
• Ideas for housing the team: LCLC, a rental property, splitting the team up into various homes, and inquiring about guest space at Hultquist Place.
• We are covering 3 breakfasts, 4 lunches, 3 dinners, and 3 overnights for a team of 5.

Engaging youth for POOL IT.

• Tara and Ian know some youth from Infinity who may provide music
• Youth from Gloria Dei attended the Mission on the Mon may be asked to relate their experiences last summer.

MISSION ON THE MON will require some fundraising. We are looking at taking 4 chaperones (who will also drive) and 16 youth.

• Jen will investigate a "300 Club" fundraiser.
• We will contact Carrie Magnuson about doing the Stateline fundraiser again.
• We could take orders for Jelly Beans before Easter.
• Tara heard about a cookie dough fundraiser.

Learning about the importance of faith milestones...

"Milestones are those meaningful, memorable moments when something significant is happening. These include the great joys, great sorrows, and other momentous events in which God is always present. There is a hope, or even an expectation, that we notice these times, recognize them, show up, and in some way honor them. We mark the event by naming it, blessing the person, gathering with others, and often denoting it with a meaningful gift. Milestone events offer an amazing opportunity to understand our participation in ministry." -- Tom Schwolert & Lyle Griner

Next Conference Youth Meeting:

Saturday, October 6 @ 9 am

First Lutheran Church, 120 Chandler St., Jamestown NY.

Worshipping together in New Orleans

Today's guest blogger is Emily Magnuson from Immanuel Lutheran Church. Emily went with Chautauqua Area Lutheran Youth to the Youth Gathering in New Orleans this July.

The most moving thing about the Youth Gathering was seeing all of the youth all together in the Superdome. There were around 33,310 people. It was amazing to see all of the youth that came from all around the world. It changed me to hear all of the people singing, worshiping and having communion. I was most suprised about all of the people that wanted to help clean New Orleans. We want it to have a safe envirorment for everyone that is living there and for all of the people that go there for vacations.

Chautauqua Area Lutheran Youth gratefully acknowledges the support of the Karl Peterson Funds & Lynn Foundation Fund of the Chautauqua Region Community Foundation in making this project a reality.

Christ the Center... or an appendage for already busy lives

Dr. David W. Anderson, a presenter, coach and author at Vibrant Faith Ministries, meditates on discipleship: "Is it time to concede that adding Jesus to busy lives feels more like the two-minute piece of straw that breaks the over scheduled back? Instead, could we pray, speak, act, think and dance as though Christ just might be as real (and as hidden) as breathing, seeing, hearing, touching, tasting, and imagining everything?" A timely read as decisions made in September often impact our family life throughout the entire school year. Read the full article at this link.

Meeting minutes for August 2012 Conference Youth Ministries Team

Southwestern Conference Youth Ministries Team Meeting
August 4, 2012 9 am
First Lutheran Church


Meeting minutes

Present: Ian Eastman (SW Conference), Tara Eastman (First Lutheran) Mike Felsman (Tri-Church), Ann McKillip (St. Tim's) & Jennifer Spacht (Bethel).
Regrets: Sue Kilmartin (Bethel), Judy Lind (Immanuel).


Devotions...

The team opened with prayer and devotions. We discussed 2 Timothy 1:2-7, a letter of encouragement from Paul to Timothy.


Schedule for 2012/2013...

Youth events:

October 14 or 21 (TBD) 3pm - 6pm
Pool Party at JCC Total Fitness Center
Waiting on confirmation from Total Fitness staff--JCC sports teams get first pick on facility. 

November 17
Captive Free Team - Children's event?
We have the Captive Free team on Saturday afternoon & evening. Perhaps use a church, YMCA, or Mall Bounce House?

November 18  1 pm - 4 pm
Whoopensocker @ Gateway Center
Lasertag, BMX/Skateboarding, Rec. Room, and snack bar for the first two hours. Captive Free will lead worship from 3 pm - 4 pm. Youth will do personal care item drive for team.

The Captive Free Team will require housing and meals from Saturday night through Tuesday morning. Exploring all avenues to host team together or separately in homes. Sue Kilmartin looking for museum passes, movie, ice arena, local restaurant passes for the team.

February 17  1 pm - 4 pm
Toilet Bowl 2 @ Gateway Center
Lasertag, BMX/Skateboarding, Rec. Room, and snack bar for the first two hours, worship from 3 pm - 4 pm. Youth will do paper product drive for local charity.

July 7 - July 12
Mission on the Mon in McKeesport PA.
Very hands on mission trip. Jeannine Gambrel from Gloria Dei took 6 youth and had a very positive experience. Looking for group of 16 youth and 4 chaperone/drivers across conference. Could pull this off for approximately $3,000 total. Deadline April 1. Will set up covenant, expenses, goals, and team expectations. Will float the idea to churches and gauge interest. Jennifer suggested a "300 Club" fundraiser.

It was brought to the team's attention that there are several schedule conflicts with Combined Conformation. Ian will work with pastors to hopefully resolve some of these issues.


Adult events

September 15 @ 1:45 pm & 3 pm
Women of the ELCA Convo @ Chautauqua Suites
Workshop: "A Field Guide to Young People"

October 26 & 27
Youth Worker Retreat @ LCLC

Also, training in the "Vibrant Faith" approach and book discussions on how to talk and pray with your child will be held for parents and other caring adults during Combined Confirmation in Jamestown area.

Other business
Bethel (Jamestown) and St. Tim's both take groups annually to Youth Quake. Is the conference interested in making this an event for all churches? The next Youth Quake is January 25 - 27.


Learning...

Going back to Paul's letter to Timothy, we discussed ways to affirm youth. These things also serve to help youth verbalize their faith in God.

• We used Paul's letter to Timothy as a template for a letter of our own. Text, email, postcards can mean a lot.
• Regular devotional times in the family... Sharing highs and lows of the day, "rose, thorn, buds," observing candle time...
• Share gifts face to face when you observe them... Describe them to other adults... and take time during special occasions to say a few words.

Upcoming meetings...

Sept.: 9/8/12 (Please note this is moved to the second Saturday to avoid the Labor Day weekend.)

Oct: 10/6/12

Nov: 11/3/12

Dec: 12/1/12

Meetings are at 9 am at First Lutheran Church, 120 Chandler St., Jamestown.

(Note: The Southwestern Conference Youth Ministries Team is open to young people in grades 9 - 12, plus interested adults. Please circulate these minutes to youth, Sunday School teachers, Christian Ed committees, etc.)

Hey! It’s Back to School Time!

Today's guest blogger is Gary Lester, the Executive Director of Family Services of Warren County—a charitable agency that provides counseling, substance abuse services, and support groups. Gary worships at First Lutheran Church in Warren, PA.

Those were the days, weren’t they? Those first couple days back to elementary school when the weather was still great, everyone had changed—especially the girls—and there wasn’t too much homework, yet… There was the time that back-to-school shopping netted me this really cool shirt with a fuzzy stripe across the front. It looked like someone had skinned a couple fox squirrels and sewn them there. It was a long-sleeved, flannel-weight shirt and it was a very hot early September day, but I was determined to wear it anyway. I was the sharpest dude at Russell Elementary… cool and sweaty at the same time!

I remember my first day at college, too, waving at my folks as they drove away. The first guy I met was named Bill, just like my best buddy at home. Bill asked: “Do you know where we can get a basketball?” We found one, found  two other guys, took  them on, and beat them soundly. Who knew that “Bill” was Billy Kalbaugh a four-year scholarship point guard who led the Bonnies to an NCAA final four appearance a few years later? And later that night, I met John who has been a best friend ever since that September day in 1966. What a great back-to-school day that was.

And that first day of grad school as a 50-year old, “non-traditional” student… Man, those classmates sure looked young… most young enough to be my kids. Looked smart, too, and energetic… “What am I doing here?” came to mind. Then we met Dr. McCarthy the instructor for our first course.  Then we learned we’d have him for some others. At break time we learned from other students that he was the toughest prof of them all. Yikes! Scary!

Looking back across those “first days back” I just noticed there isn’t much focus on academic learning. Oh well, they still were great experiences or they wouldn’t still be this strong  in my usually weak  memory.

These days, I think EVERYONE should be thinking: “back to school.” I’m not saying we should all necessarily  matriculate (don’t get to use that word very often) to some formal school or class. I’m saying we ought to think about life-long learning from all the experiences we can pick from. Attend a city council or township supervisors’ meeting. Go to a lecture on a topic you know nothing about. Go to a school play or concert or game even if you don’t have kids involved.  Take a walk through town. Look around, look up and down, see what’s there that you’ve been missing. There are a lot of things you never notice when driving by at 35 miles an hour.”

What else has lessons to teach us? Nature certainly does. Over the next few weeks, we’ll be once again treated to fall foliage. Think about it… The earth is a pretty big place, but we live in a relatively narrow band where that happens to the glorious extent we enjoy. I wonder if there is similar band all around the world and in the southern hemisphere… I’ll have to check that out.

It never ceases to amaze me all the “stuff” going on in this town. The newspaper is a treasure trove of information on attractions and activities. In any given week there are literally pages of ideas on where to go for new experiences.  Again, “going to school” doesn’t necessarily mean attending some formal institution. You will find “teachers” and “classmates” all over. Consider clubs, sports, radio controlled racing, HAM radio operation, local theater activities… the list is endless. And I am 100% positive folks involved in these things will be downright excited if you show up; every “school” has its “teachers.”  I’ve made a promise to myself that over the next few months I am going to check out a woodworking class and learn how to process digital photos.

One of the beauties of this informal education is that you can simply try stuff without much expense, or any fear of failure.

I’ve always thought that September 1 should be considered the first of the year. Schools, clubs and organizations, churches, etc., are all firing up programs right now. Happy “back to school” time! Let’s all get out there and learn something new!